Big Orange Roundtable: The Pure Hate Edition

It is the week that I look forward to more than any, the Third Saturday in October week.  To this Tennessee Volunteer raised in the state of Alabama, no game, no matter what season means more to me than this one.  Please check back as I describe my experiences; some horrible, some unforgettable, as the week progresses.

This weeks addition of BOR is hosted by my Friends at the Third Saturday In Blogtober.

The week starts off with Star War themed, which I am mostly clueless about, but I’ll do my best.

Book mark us this week, and check out the other bloggers participating in this week’s Big Orange Roundtable:

• Fulmers Belly
• South Eastern Sports Blog
• Third Saturday in Blogtober
• YMSWWC
• Uncle Rico’s Time Machine
• Roll Bama Roll
• DBH Dance Party
• Gate 21

Both teams at some point or another have been described as an Evil Empire.  If your team is the Death Star, what is it’s planet-destroying weapon?

I would normally say Eric Berry… and that is the correct answer, and the one that I am sure most of Vol Nation would say.  I am going to be different and go with Robert Ayers. 

A big game will be needed from Robert Ayers this Saturday under the Neyland lights

We simply have to have an outstanding game from our defensive line.  The emotional leader on that unit is Ayers.  He has really turned it up a notch over the last few games.  We will need him to pressure Bama Bangs and outside contain the strong side to somewhat hold Mark Ingram, Glen Coffe, and Roy Upchurch to minimal gains.  Increased pressure in the pocket should allow our corners to run more man coverage, which we will desperately need to contain the likes of Julio Jones and Nikta Stover.  If we line up with a 8 yard cushion we will simply get picked apart.  Increase the pressure Robert, hit Sarah Jessica Parker Wilson like you have punished quarterbacks the last two games, and let the DBs make the spectacular plays.

What is it’s two meter wide exhaust port?

What in the hades does that mean?

Ok, whats the weak link?

Daniel Lincoln and/or the Mustang Package.  I simply have no faith in our kicker Daniel Lincoln.  I do not place the blame solely on Lincoln.  I believe his mind has been shot ever since the UCLA game, when Fulmer lined him up several times for 53+ yard kicks.  Why in the world do you toy with such a fragile thing, such as the brain and confidence of our kicker.  Dumb move Phil, and its been an achilles heal for us all season. 

John Chavis working on the Orange Mustang for the Bama game.

 

Also, the Mustang Package is equally weak.  I was speaking earlier to a very wise older friend of mine, and we both agreed the moment we lost the Georgia game was on the 3rd and 8 from the UGA 7 yard line.  I cringed and feel out of my seat as I saw our DBs and LBs step 5 yards back in coverage.  Julio Jones will pick this apart similarly to what DJ Hall did last year.  7 yard slant… 8 yard slant… bang bang bang, the Mustang is dead.  Also in this package when the LBs back off several yards, that becomes a free 5-7 yards for the Tight End.  Bammer has one of the SECs best tight ends in Nick Walker.  He is big physcial and will exploit the middle and the flats.  We don’t cover the flats in the Mustang.  I just threw up on myself. 

Everyone is looking forward to Eric Berry vs. Julio Jones.  What is the next matchup you’ll be keying on in this game?

 Nick Stephens & Crew (WRs) versus the Alabama DBs.  I honestly don’t know that I’m looking forward to this, but it probably is the most important match up.  A Nick Satan coached Dbackfield is always extremely physical and rarely plays zone.  They will be man to man, three yards off of the ball, and will jam our recievers hard as they come out of their stance.  The WRs must be ready for physical play, and must work to get open.  Nick as well, must pick his poison this game more than any one previous.  We have not faced this caliber of a defensive backfield, so he needs to be careful throwing into coverage.  Bama’s safeties are not afraid of stepping up and interupting routs.  They just simply are not afraid of giving up the deep ball, so their is no reason for the safeties to not crash the routes.  I would like to see Nick and Crew exploit this early and often.  I am sure Bammer will be expecting an early deep route to Denarius Moore.  I think we need to take that to them and test them deep.  That won’t loosen the man coverage, but it might keep the safeties a step back.

The Tide and Vols will scrap it out under the lights at Neyland.  Do you like this arrangement and does the later kickoff time provide an advantage to either team?

I always feel like this is a true advantage for the home team.  It has to be uncomfortable enough for visiting teams to travel.  Not to mention adding an additional 4-7 hours of pregame time from the more typical 12:00-3:00 p.m. kickoffs.  For all of us Vols fans, we know that magic happens under the lights at Neyland Stadium, and those Volunteers, who are not traitors, continue to support the Vols will be even more ready and loud for this game.  Its simple, in the SEC, anytime the home team is playing a night game, they have the advantage. 

Since the Tide had a bye week and the Vols didn’t bother to play that weekend either (zing!) we’re going to say this is the Third Saturday in October just to justify the name of one of the greatest rivalries in college football.  In three thousand words or less, turn over the kettles of white-hot liquid hate upon thine enemy.

Nothing smells better than a dead elephant

I was born in Tennessee.  I grew up in Alabama.  I currently live in Alabama.  I hate Alabama worse than I hate Satan.  I hate Alabama worse than I hate Barack Obama’s socialist ways. I hate Alabama.  Not so much the state, or its people, but particularly the University of Alabama football team and its history.  The state really is great, but its more or less a wanna be Tennessee.  The little brother if you would.  The mountains aren’t impressive and are merely dirt mounds.  Alabama’s best river and fishing, comes from Tennessee, and then eventually goes home through Tennessee again.  No really nice metropolises, and don’t even count the Tragic City of Birmingham, and Mobile is a dump too.  If it wasn’t for all of us smart engineers, Huntsville would be a barren wasteland only compariable to Mississippii or Arkansas.  However, I respect the football traditions of Alabama.  I personally know more about Alabama football and history than most Alabama fans I know.  Thats a sad fact.  Is that my obsession of hatred for Alabama, or is it just poor Alabama fans.  I think its a combination of both. 

I hate:

• David Palmer’s 1993 two point conversion
• Bear Bryant giving swimming scholarships to his football players
• The Junction Boys Movie… listen Bammers the movie has nothing to do with your team
• Houndstooth – Everytime a hot girl wears houndstooth a little part of me dies
• Jay Barker
• Bama Bangs, and those who sport them
• Denny Chimes
• Dreamland
• The Soup Store
• Legion Field
• Eli Gold

I love:

• Kenny Stabler’s alcoholism
  

  Hey Bartender, Jobu needs a refill!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

• Joe Namath (drunk) wanting to Kiss Suzy Kolber
• Freddie Kitchens
• Mike Dubose
• Albert Means
• 4th and 19 in 2003

 

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