The Absentee Fantasy Owner

There are few things in the world of sports that get on my nerves more than an absentee fantasy owner. I love fantasy sports, and I am fairly efficient at managing my teams. Everyone makes mistakes, and I will be the first one to admit that I am included in that group. Off the top of my head, I have started Brandon Jackson, Patrick Crayton, Todd Heap, and Jerricho Cotchery at various times this season when I was either gambling that they would play or wasn’t paying attention to the injury reports. There is no excuse for it, and fortunately, none of my mistakes cost me a win. Had they cost me a win, however, I would have deserved it for not paying close enough attention.

In particular, I want to give you the rundown on my team in the bloggers league that several sports bloggers joined. My team got out to an awful start (thank you Steven Jackson), and I lost my first three games. My fourth game appeared to be a win up until Yahoo recalculated the points, taking away a point and ending the game in a tie. So, after four weeks, my team was 0-3-1, terribly disappointing because I was so happy with the team I had.

Here is my lineup:

1. Brett Favre
2. Steven Jackson
3. Jamal Lewis
4. Terrell Owens
5. Lee Evans
6. Dallas Clark
7. Kris Brown
8. Pittsburgh’s Defense

My bench isn’t too shabby either:

1. Maurice Jones-Drew
2. Donald Driver
3. David Garrard (picked up later)
4. Sidney Rice (picked up later)
5. Jerious Norwood (picked up later)
6. Jason Elam (picked up later)
7. Buffalo’s Defense (picked up later)

My team finally started performing, and I went on a 5-3 run going into last week’s game (record was 5-6-1). One of the losses was by a point, which made it even more frustrating. The most frustrating thing at all is that I had the second-highest scoring team in the entire league, and to say that I was underperforming in the win/loss column would be an understatement.

This brings me to the point of this post: there is a difference between making mistakes/taking gambels and being an absentee fantasy owner. In order to get into the playoffs going into the last week (six teams would), I needed to win, and I also needed two of the three teams in front of me to lose. Making it less complicated was the fact that I was playing one of those teams so I could take care of him myself. I did.

One of the other teams won his game on Sunday, so it was up to that final team to lose. I looked at the other team’s opponent on Sunday night, and he had a 24 point lead over one of the teams I needed to lose. The bad news was, that team I needed to lose had Willis McGahee and Wes Welker playing on Monday night, and I was almost assured of losing with the way those two guys had been playing. I noticed that the guy with the lead still hadn’t played a quarterback. I looked through his roster, and he was starting Steve McNair. STEVE %*%&** MCNAIR!?!? WHAT THE HELL? My first thought was that it was collusion between the two owners to either keep me out of the playoffs or get the other guy in. I realized that wasn’t the case immediately after looking back at his schedule: he had been starting Steve McNair since New England’s bye week. Does that give you a hint to the quarterback who was sitting on his bench? Tom. Brady. This guy is the only guy in America that didn’t start Tom Brady every week (excluding the bye weeks). Consequently, he is also the only guy that had Brady on his squad that didn’t make the playoffs.

There couldn’t have been any way he was doing it on purpose, and I realized that he is just that guy who is the worst of all fantasy owners. He hadn’t given up, because he could and probably would have made the playoffs had he been starting Tom Brady and managing his team at least once a week. He was an absentee fantasy owner. He just checked out, and I don’t understand how or why he did it. How does a guy who is as fanatical about sports as a guy who runs a sports blog just check out like that? I guess it is excusable if he had a life crisis or some other good reason, although I hope that isn’t the case (come on, I don’t hate the guy).

I repeatedly tried to contact the guy, and I asked him to log in and update his roster. I emailed the guy a couple times, I contacted the league commissioner, and I put a message in my “trash talk” begging him to update his team. I even went to the guy’s blog and left a comment telling him to update his team. My efforts were in vain. At kickoff, Steve McNair was still his starting quarterback, torn rotator cuff and all.

The story had a happy ending because Wes Welker had his worst night of the season, accumulating a mere 18 yards receiving. McGahee had one of his best nights, but the guy I needed to lose still came up two points short, despite the negligence of the guy who was managing the Steve McNair Goon Squad. My team is one of the two or three best in the league, and I almost got screwed out of making the playoffs by an absentee fantasy owner.

To anyone who plays or is interested in playing fantasy sports, here is a message to you: check your damn team and be diligent. To quote Herm Edwards, “You play to win the game.” This is not a pay league or anything (which would really make me mad), but that isn’t the point. I don’t play or join anything just to lose, even if it is as simple as a board game. People that don’t care and don’t do their best can potentially ruin the game for everyone else. So, the next time you are “not sure” or are “on the fence” or don’t know if you can keep up with a team all season, SAY NO. Play solitaire instead, so when you quit, the only person you are letting down is yourself.